10 ways to improve your marriage today

So many Top Tens.  Top Tens for politics, sports, and television shows.  My wife thought that I could come up with a Top Ten Ways to Improve Our Marriage Today.  Not sure why she thought I should create this, but, here you go.

1)    Listen – It sounds so simple, but it is true.  How do you feel when you know you are really being listened to?  How do you feel when you know you are not being listened to?  See the difference?  Listening while you read the paper or watch the TV is not listening. 

2)    Apologize – Take my advice men and apologize every morning when you wake up.  Before you do something wrong!  In any relationship, you will have something for which to apologize.  A genuine apology communicates that you care enough about the other person to admit when you are wrong and try not to do it again. 

3)    Compliment – Saying something nice about your partner’s dress, shirt, or haircut are all nice things.  You can go farther with: “I really like the way you handled that situation”, “You are such a good dad/mom”, and “That was a great meal honey.”

4)    Touch-hold-caress – Everyone needs to be touched.  When I work with couples who are having problems, one of the very first things I suggest is to simply hold each other.  That one small move contributes to a great deal of healing in a relationship.

5) Ask questions – Asking questions is one way to show genuine interest and to      discover someone’s dreams.  It honors them and places real value on who they are.  Asking questions also will get people talking and that is always good.

I could only come up with five.  Let me check with Jane and get back to you with five more!